LUCY, THE EVIL FAIRY

Lucy was Tinkerbell’s older sister. She had a mustache and her eyebrows grew together.

She had tried to kill Tinkerbell with poison over the years, but nothing worked. She wrote a book about fairies being immune to most poisons. No one wants to publish it. You'll see why in a second. 

It would be cathartic if it was published. Lucy has a lot of hostility in her. 

For example, before Tinkerbell flew off to have adventures, Lucy did try to superglue her wings together but Disney’s Fairy Police bitch slapped her.

Lucy started to drink. She wound up prostituting herself. Eventually she contracted a STD and now has become a missionary. No one thinks her idea of going to the Mid-East to broker a peace deal is workable. She is sincere though.

She’s basically insane but like most crazy people, she is interesting to talk to. The thing is, you wouldn’t want to visit her with the door closed and no guard in sight. I left out some pertinent info. Lucy is at a mental health facility in Florida. It’s funded by generous contributions from a certain studio known for its cartoons and family-oriented films and theme parks. The grants are to aid in the rehabilitation of insane and addicted former cartoon stars.

Few know of its existence. But it’s so full, many referrals, urgent though they are, are turned away.

Visiting hours are never a problem as no one ever visits. For one thing, there is the paparazzi lurking. They freelance for other studios in competition with the bigly one that maintains a low profile here, anyway.

When a bus ferrying the arrivals is spotted, the crazy former cartooners rush forward, they taunt and ridicule the newbies and take bets on ‘who will be the first to crack’ on their first night. Yeah, just like that story by you know who.

I bet you want to know who I am. I’m Pinocchio’s mummy, forget about Geppetto, already! It wasn’t an easy birth you know!

Well, bye for now. I’ll see if I can think of more to tell you about the other inmates here. Just remember, there’s no business like business or the business of writing.

carole gill 2017 copyright