Here we go! The first of the Toxic Fairy Tales!
IT DOESN’T MATTER
IF YOU WIN OR LOSE, ONLY THAT YOU TRY!
England, 1610
Goody Jones was one card short of a deck. In an age that
didn’t look fondly upon people who were different, poor old Goody stood out.
And that was before she started with the platitudes.
If she was barely tolerated previously, when she began
giving out little pieces of paper with writing on them, she was singled out for
abuse.
At first the angry backlash consisted of just annoyed mutterings
from fellow townsfolk but then it escalated.
Poor Goody never noticed. The sad thing was all she
wanted was to help folk.
She got it into her head to try and help as many of her
neighbors as she could. She saw many things wrong in her little village of
Sicknee, just outside of Filey in North Yorkshire. And because, though, as off
the wall as she was, she thought she could help people, she began writing out
those ‘clever sayings’ she heard about. You know the ones, about horrific
events making you stronger. As in what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger!
Yeah those! Annoying buggers of advice thought of by people who are
put on this earth to drive most of the population mad.
Sadly, Goody had a head start. As she thought the people would
benefit from what she saw as wisdom.
When the butcher lost his wife and his business, she
handed him one of her notes. It said: Good
things come to those who wait.
The butcher fell into a rage and ran after her screaming.
Venting. Venting didn’t help but he was arrested and fined for disturbing the
peace. That got him angrier. Goody saw that and wrote out another one of her
clever sayings. This was: forgive and
forget.
She handed it to him herself right through the prison
bars. Actually, he let it fall to the floor. But then curiosity, though not
killing him or the cat, got the better of him and he read it. When the silliness of the advice sank in,
he screamed. He was lashed for screaming while in custody.
When he threatened to kill Goody Jones by filleting her,
she left another sayings for him. It said: God
had a plan for him.
Butcher Mills died right on the spot, while the little
scribbled paper, blew away.
It came to rest at the feet of a guard who picked it up.
He liked the advice and went home to tell his wife who was sitting outside
their burnt-out cottage. Their humble abode was no more. The guard thought the
advice might help his wife but she attacked him, hissing like a cat.
Their children began screaming because they never saw
their father’s face bleed like that.
Gradually, the inhabitants of the village became more
hostile to the old woman and decided to murder the stupid old bitch.
A lynch mob was formed and poor old Goody Jones was dragged
from her little hovel.
She pleaded for her life but was told her time was up and
when it’s up it’s up.
They hanged the old girl with a sign meticulously painted
by a sign maker for free. They put the sign around her dead neck.
It read:
YOU’RE IN A BETTER
PLACE.
© carole gill 2017
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